Home

Recently, my dad came back from a training that lasted about 3 weeks. It was originally supposed to last a month but they were coming early.

Mom and I had missed dad more than ever before. For some reason it happened this way this time. The most interesting thing was that this instance was the shortest period ever that my dad had to be gone.

Everyday we found it grueling to not have dad home. One week had passed and it seemed like months. We just didn't understand why it felt so long for him to come back.

I was at church serving. Then mom calls me and I scurry out to pick it up. She was going to go pick dad up.

How I wanted to leave to head home! We had about 20 minutes left though.

Service ended and I hurried to head home. It felt like forever. Just at the thought of seeing dad again tears began to well up in my eyes. I tried to save them though ;)

Getting home I was exiting my car murmuring to myself, "Whew, ok. Breathe. Don't cry. Aaaah, I'm so excited....."

I walked up to the door and passing the window I see him. Dad. Way thinner than he was when he left. But just at the sight of his face my heart just melted. Made way for the tears. I saw him smile through the window because he saw me peeking in before I even opened the door.

Trying to unlock the doors (screen door and main door), I couldn't believe how slow my keys went in. "Ooooh my gosh," I said. "Can these go any slower?!" I saw him and felt like a baby. Practically threw my bag on the floor in the middle of the entrance... I didn't care where or how it landed at the moment. Then I said, "Daddy!" with tears going down my cheeks while I clapped like a 5-year old. I hastly walked up to him, almost running, all the while looking to realize that he was actually there, and went in for the hug.

He also had tears in his eyes so it was mutual :)


Well, something that I purposely failed to mention was that on the way home, the Spirit reminded me of Jesus' coming. To be as eager for His coming as I was for my earthly dad's. That everyday I might yearn for Him to come back so that I can be with Him, as I longed to be with dad. That 3 weeks away from my dad seemed so grueling but 21 years waiting for Him awakens in me a fire for His return.

His voice on the way home made me weep. It was a sweet reminder that His coming is as close and as real as my dad coming home that night. That I will see Jesus and I will be with Him and that I will be full of joy to the point of clapping and jumping and that all I'll want to do is be with Him.

"Behold, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give everyone according to what he has done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End." Rev 22:12-13

Think think think

For some reason, I have suddenly become concerned for my future.
Is it lack of trust in the Lord?
Is it that I myself don't even know what I want to do?
Maybe it's because of all the graduations happening.

I planned on graduating this year, so maybe that's why I've realized how close I am to graduating (I still have 1 more year to graduate because I picked up another major).

Questions:
What do I really want to be?
Where is it that I'll be most effective?
Would I really love working with families?
Should I intern here or there? For how long?

I'm just trying to get to know myself a little better. It seems like I don't. Weirdly enough.
Like I'm trying to figure out where I'll want to be in a year... or even more, where the Lord'll want me.
Trying to figure out ministry as well: serving with Jr. Highers or serving with another population.
I'm just not sure!!!
Is that ok to say?
I'm not sure.
All I know is that God is still God.
He is still on His throne and I want Him to have control of my life, of my uncertainties, of me.
But I want to trust.
Sometimes we have such a hard time trusting others. The thing is that this Somebody isn't just a somebody.
I believe that the more we get to know Him the more we learn to trust Him.
The more we learn of who He is, the more we realize that trusting Him is all we can do.
We'll begin to say, "Why not trust Him? There's no other way."

Exceeded Expectations

The largest faith you have to have to move a mountain is the size of a seed... a mustard seed to be exact.

Last weekend close friends, brothers, sisters and myself traveled to the southern land of Texas. We were on a mission of showing Christ to others. Making Him known through the ministry of Pure Rebellion.
Lives were ministered to, hearts broken and rebuilt, souls rescued, Jesus glorified.

It was hard for me to realize that we were actually going to TX with this ministry and that the Lord had allowed me to be part of it. So many times I said, "I can't believe we're in Texas..." It was just mindblowing being there. But mindblowing describes what the Lord did both nights.

We were pumped to launch Pure Rebellion at Grace Church. The crowd didn't blow us away though. No, it wasn't a full house. Expectations drained, we just prayed that Jesus would still work on those who came. And He did. Even more, He reminded us that if (for example) I would have been the only one left on the earth, He still would have died, just for me, to save me from eternal misery. In other words, one soul makes everything the matter. One soul makes all the difference. And what a humbling and love-filled truth. If only one soul was saved in Amarillo, TX, all the heavens rejoiced.

But seeing a crowd of kids, teenagers, young adults and adults at the altar, on their knees, broken, weeping, reaching out for Jesus... exceeded our expectations.

"I will do a mighty work tonight," the Lord told me. And it broke me in the most refreshing way.

Coming to find out that for Grace Church, Pure Rebellion was such an immense blessing that has renewed lives confirmed that the work that the Lord had sent us to do was accomplished. It was a new beginning. One in which seeds were planted by Jesus, watered by Jesus, and will come to have fruit because of Jesus.
For Jesus.
By Jesus.

The Good Kinda Fear

Reading a blog from Pyromaniacs: Setting the World on Fire from May there was a post of a Spurgeon daily dose and the following quote was a head nod slash smirk of "dat's right..."

This was not the style of preaching that John's hearers liked; but John did not think of that. He did not come to say what men wished him to say, but to discharge the burden of the Lord, and to speak out plainly what was best for men's eternal and immortal interests. He spoke, therefore, first, concerning the wrath of God; and, next, he spoke concerning the way of escape from that wrath.

Pretty much realizing the seriousness that the Lord holds in His heart of the salvation of men.
To do so, we must remember the wrath to come. Not to induce fear for a hurried, forced repentance that lasts a week but to cultivate a holy fear of God.
Also, a great reminder that we're not here to tell nice Candy Land, fairy tale stories and promises that'll please people and sugar coat their entrance to the Kingdom but to deliver the solid, simple truth of God and His sobering Word of truth.

Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.
It starts there.